Since I returned home, I have been hiding. Im not really sure how to deal with my emotions. My ex and I chose this path, the path to the destruction of our marriage, and as much as I like to understand people, I am not going to attempt to understand where he is coming from or why. that is his path, a path that has taken my daughter away from the church. One I won't travel, my path has led me closer to the Saviour, A path filled with agonies I had never imagined. But also a path filled with hope. It has been along time since I had hope.
My faith has blossomed. I have met and continue to meet inspirational people who are powering down the same road as I am blazing a trail to immortality, eternal life and my favourite for right now HAPPINESS.
I find it hard to dwell in the feelings that surround the mess that was once my marriage. I am now an outsider, looking in to another family that contains my daughter and her new siblings. Siblings i longed to give her. Sitting far from what once was, and having no idea what will be. Trying to balance my wants with reality, putting my faith in eternity. so that leads to the question
So, What Now?
Now i face forward. I do things I wasn't given the chance to. School starts soon, a direction to travel for my previously purposeless driven life.
Now I read scriptures with my daughter via skype- when she lets me.
Now I become comfortable in my skin- or rather i work on me.
Now I figure out what next.
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